A china hummingbird
by greencyanide
Summary: "So it'll be so lonely this Christmas/Without you to hold/It'll be so very lonely/Lonely and cold" - Mud.  Christmas 1976.


Severus ducked as he saw the demise of the old, chipped vase at the bottom of the stairs. The calendar stated that it was Christmas, but holidays and celebrations didn't mean much in the Snape household. Severus hopped to the kitchen, sidestepping the shards scattered on the floor, hoping that there would be some food worth nicking in there.

But, even on Christmas, his luck was against him - apart from the few bits of mouldy cheese and flaky rolls, the pantry had nothing that would satisfy his growling stomach. There was no betting when his mother would come down or if she would fix anything up at all.

Severus fingered the two soggy oners in his pocket he had earned by shovelling snow from the Wilkins' and Vaugns' yard. He did not have anyone to buy a gift for - two pounds and some odd job would buy him a cheap meal at Fournier's.

With a long sigh, Severus put on his coat and boots. Just as he was about to wrench the door open, he heard a scuffle, followed by a loud yell - his father's.

Severus ran upstairs, covering three steps at a time.

His mother was standing, wand in hand. A raw red weal was stamped across her cheek, and his father lay on the floor, unconscious.

"Did you use a spell?" asked Severus, in shock.

"Yes," said Eileen Snape, quietly - not a trace of guilt in her voice.

She bent down and pulled out the wallet from his father's pocket. She sifted though it's contents and fished out a wad of notes.

"Take this, buy yourself a gift and a nice dinner," she said, throwing a handful of notes at him. "Go!"  
Severus walked out of the house, the scarf up to his nose against the chill. Deciding to eat first, he took the shortest path to Fournier's, only to find that it was closed.

He knocked on the door.

Monique Fournier, the owner's elder daughter, peered out.

"Oh, Severus," she said. "Merry Christmas!"

"Yeah, Merry Christmas. I was wondering, isn't the restaurant gonna open?"

"No, didn't you see the board?" she said stepping out of the house and pointing at the small sign hanging from the shutters. "We are closed for today."

"Oh," said Severus, disappointed.

"Mama and Papa have gone to my great aunt's home, she is very ill. I would have asked Papa to fix you something if he were here," she said.

Maybe it was not pity in her voice, but Severus felt a little ashamed, and said, "It's okay, I guess I will go to Rogers."

_Of course, that I cannot afford a dinner at Rogers is an entirely different matter_, he thought bitterly as he walked away.

"Severus, wait!"

He turned around to see Monique running up, towards him.

"Why don't you have dinner with us, Severus? Me and Annabelle?" she said.

Severus felt a little thrown off by the gesture, but of course, he knew he had to decline. "No, Monique, I can't," he said simply.

"Why not, Severus? Come on, we are friends, and friends should not eat alone on Christmas."

Severus suppressed a smirk. He was born into a family where holiday traditions meant less than nothing.

"It's okay, Monique," said Severus, starting to think knocking at her door was a bad idea. He did not expect to have the bistro opened just for him, did he?

"Look who's there!"

Severus spun around to see a bunch of rowdy boys from Orpington Middle School cackling down the street.

"Come to beg at Fournier's, Snape?" guffawed one of them.

"Sod off," snapped Severus.

"Or else what? You'll call you Daddy, eh?"

"Ta Gueule!" screamed Monique. "Get out of here, you buffoons!"

A couple of them whistled.

"Oooh, I'm sooo scaaared. Snape is being protected by his girlfriend now," drawled one of them.

The next instant, that boy was on the floor, gagging and gasping for breath as Severus wrung his neck with his scarf. He couldn't even feel the kicks and fists on his back, so potent and protective was his anger.

"Severus, don't! Let go, Severus," shouted Monique.

But Severus did not stop, until a few men came out of their houses and broke off the fight.

One of them was Mr. Wilkins, who looked at him soberly and said, "Severus, I had not expected this from you. You were going to choke him to death!"

As Monique apologized to the men and told off the boys some more, Severus quietly walked away from the group.

Only after he had crossed two streets did he breathe freely again. _So much for a nice dinner_, he thought, feeling the bruises and bumps in his back.

Even the small shops of Carson Street had been lit up in the festivities, small lights twinkling around the windows. Bill Ward's china shop was the only one in the neighbourhood which looked no different than it did every other time of the year. The lack of lustre, as if it had forsaken all the celebrations, invited Severus to enter. He stepped in to take a look, though he had no intention of buying knick-knacks. The shop seemed empty, and he drifted towards the dusty rack at the corner of the shop.

He was drawn to a small porcelain hummingbird, at the top of the rack. It was not exquisite or a detailed figure - it was plain and youthful with very bold colours. It had Severus picked the figurine off the rack and brushed off the dust. Holding the hummingbird in his hand, he felt like he knew it for long, as if it was a reminder of something. Though he couldn't remember exactly what, somehow, he felt it was important.

"Ten pounds. Not a penny less."

Old man Ward was standing beside him, with a grave look in his eyes - the condescending look that old men from this part of the town generally reserved for the boys from the wrong side of the river.

Severus pulled out all the notes from his pocket.

He wandered from street to street, the ocassional chime of the carolers lifted his spirits a little and the sight of the snowmen in the front yards cheered him a too. As a kid, he had always loved making snowmen, until one day, in a drunked bout, his father kicked down the head of one. That had really ruined snowmen for him.

He was not aware, and did not care anyway, where his feet were taking him, until he reached the last house of the Brougham Street. He did not dare look at the brightly lit windows.

He stood there staring at the snowman. The carrot had fallen off it's head. He sleathily walked in through the front gate and picked up the carrot, fixing it.

"Tuney! Thanks so much for the snowdome! It looks so wonderful!"

Severus' eyes involuntarily shifted towards the windows. Lily Evans was hugging her sister fiercely, thanking her for the gift.

He could have stood there for an eternity and see her move around, unaware of his eyes.

But suddenly, she dashed out of the room and seconds later, the front door opened - she had spotted him! Severus knew he should make a run for it, but his feet seemed to have frozen.

Mrs. Evans' voice floated out from the house. "Lily dear, what are you doing out in the snow?"

"Mum, I will go fetch some more logs from the garage," she called back, without moving her eyes from him.

Then she slowly stepped into the snow, drawing her coat close as she got closer to him, as if drawing strength and safety from it.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, confrontation in her voice.

He shrugged. "I don't know."  
"Don't stalk me!" she spouted.

"I'm not," said Severus, indifferently.

He looked at her for one last long moment, before turning on his heel and shuffling out of the gate.

On his was out, he tossed the hummingbird into the trash can.

_**~o0o~**_

_"Isn't it beautiful?" she said, in a hushed voice._

_"If you say so," he said, without interest. He was keeping an eye for old man Ward, who did not like children in his shop._

_She lightly touched the china figure, afraid she might break it if she wasn't gentle._

_"What bird is it?" he asked, noticing the it for the first time._

_"It's a hummingbird, silly!" she reprimanded, continuing to stare at it._

_They were standing at the corner of the shop, tiptoeing and admiring it._

_After a while, she whispered, "Do you think Mum will buy it for me if I ask her?"_

_He shrugged. "You should ask her and see."_

_She pondered over the thought without taking her eyes off it._

_"Or we can save up our allowances so we can buy it for Christmas. It'll be our gift to each other."_

_He nodded, smiling at her. "That's a good idea. And you can keep it at your house."_

_"Really, Sev? You're the best friend ever!" she squealed, hugging him._

_They couldn't save up enough before Christmas and slowly forgot the hummingbird, which lay on the rack, day after day, collecting dust, waiting to be admired, to be someone's gift to another..._

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE : Written for Hogwarts Monthly Challenge**


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